Monday, February 24, 2014

Cruel world for Innocent soul

It has been a long while since I wrote the last post. Normally I only write when I'm in deeps***. The feeling of writing all the depression and frustration in writing, all these can become a history for me to look back and reflect what have happen in the past. Blog is becoming my personal diary where I wrote all my joys, tears and frustration.

The story begin during year end of 2013. I'm conducting some tasks without proper procedure and of course in term of compliance, I knew that I'm in trouble. Yet taking into the business risk and team reputation, if things didn't conduct in such manner, a lot of people rice bowl will dabao. Of course, I'm not a superhero where I can declare I'm saving a lot of people, but we are all in the same boat where if the boat sink, none of the people will survive. The intention of preventing the boat from sinking is the 'right' choice, the procedure wise is debatable. 

Now the boat has reached the destination, most of the people on the boat just go to shore and feel relieve that they have survived this project. The boatmen didn't feel this way, they are the one who execute, put all their efforts and brain in getting through the storm while preventing the boat from sinking. During the journey, boatmen have done things not according to procedure, yet managed to saved all the people life through the storm.

What really hurts when some of the passengers are accusing the boatmen of breaching the compliant or didn't follow the procedure and hand the boatmen to the authority. Sometimes, procedure are made to follow, of course there is always exceptional case. I'm not justifying that the action of boatmen is 'correct' yet the intention of saving people life in thunderstorm should take into consideration. Now that the authority is seeking any disciplinary actions to be taken to the boatmen. Pity all the boatmen, their actions now become their biggest liability because the management didn't take any required steps to defend the boatmen intention.

Now what will happen when the boatmen face the same passengers? Should the boatmen sink together with the passenger since boatmen didn't gain any benefits from saving the passengers and sail them to the journey.

I'm in such dilemma. I think in the long term, the boatmen and the passengers will not have mutual understanding and since boatmen can swim, may as well let the passengers to sink and die than saving them. Saving them is a liability, and the passenger will accuse you of breaching procedure. Don't you think it is a cruel world yet reality it require the survivor of the fittest?  

Principally, I'm not a such cruel boatmen. May be the culture is like this and every people is covering their a**. So next time, I have learned a lesson that cost me a lot. Of course, the young boatman has nothing to lose in this game. Some passengers are always covering their big fat a** and bite the boatmen when they arrived at their destination. 

Is a reality and cruel world for such innocent young boatman. T.T  

Wednesday, May 29, 2013


It has been a long time since I have this feeling. This week is not really smooth for me. Suddenly, I have received so many shocking news to an extent where I'm unable to take it.

Out of sudden, my department has changed overnight. Whoever can point finger to this and that, but the whole intention is good and no one appreciate it. Sometimes we are too obsessed with figure that we have forgot what we are doing. I saw clear as crystal clear what is meet people talk with people, meet ghost talk with ghost.

At night, when we went out, suddenly being forced to answer some question. I never admit to anyone before and no choice have to tell. It is something that is very sensitive yet being insist to answer really make my day worse.

I'm not sure how deep is the hole as I can felt the situation is a little bit out of control. I'm gonna be strong. Very strong indeed. 

Sunday, May 26, 2013


There are things that happen accidentally in life. Some say it is fate and some may say it is part of journey. While for me to define the coincide in life, with all the things that happen, this is part of the journey where everyone will go through. 

At first I didn't expect much on this coincide, it has been a few years since the last demonstrations. At that time, I'm still attending university and have a happy go lucky life. After graduated, found a good job and life is becoming a routine until the time where this coincident happen and it has hooked up for a while.

I didn't expect much from this coincident, yet this always give me hope and signal where I'm unable to understand. I wish that I'll understand the situation properly and respond to it in a calm manner, but things are not always the same. At some point is been a happy moment, then everyone become moody. I'll always look at the bright side and believed that even with all the negative thought, we shall overcome it together. By the way, this coincide is still part of the beautiful memory where I will keep it.

Chinese poem is not my strength, if I read one poem, I will need to google for its meaning. Then there is a day where I came across a poem on flower and water. If this is the meaning for the whole coincide, I would rather this be put on the table and speak directly instead of going twist and turn. Anyway, until today I'm still didn't get the meaning behind the whole story and regret it for not trying hard.

Whatever happen, I'll keep it aside and always open to reconnect. I hope that you understand this and appreciate the coincide that happen. If we didn't take any actions for now, this will become another history and another journey instead of milestone.

Monday, December 24, 2012


It has been quite a long time since I wrote the last post. Compare to Facebook, I prefer to write blog because blog gives me an infinity space to write whatever that I wanted and not everyone have access to it provided they know my identity and blog address. I can write whatever I want in the blog without my colleagues notice that.

One day, my junior colleagues asked me what am I going to be after completed the training period. He bench marked me against one of my peers who is going to take over the role of plant engineer. Plant engineer, huh? It is a nice title and huge responsibility come with it. He asking whether did I mind if some of my peers are far better than me. They got better position, better pay etc

I'm not surprise when hearing that news. Position and pay is not what am I looking for. I don't mind that my peers are far superior than me, it didn't means that I'm not good, this indicates that we are taking different paths. My view on my current job scope is everything back to basics. Yes, when you reach certain position, you will be burden with all the paperwork, reports, problem solving tools and many more. If you ask me, I'm not the person that looking for fast-forward career, it didn't means anything to me and obviously is not my objectives.

I read a post before that before 30, we have to work to invest ourselves, money and position is not the main considerations for now. We have to invest in ourselves, preparing what we need to knows (knowledge and experience) and when opportunity come, then we can go for it.

机会只留给有准备的人。I will always remember this quote.

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Together Everyone Achieve More

It has been a while since the last time I have updated my blog. There is many changes that happen, firstly I've changed my job, my housemates have changed, some move out and other move in. Now I only realized I have been working for the past 1 year. Wow~ time really fly.

Talking back about the team building, I'm the organizer for this year team building activity. In 2011, there is no any team building activity for my department. What can I say is I'm very honor to be given such an opportunity to organize this year team building activity. Since money is not an issue, then I can choose the best that suit my team. I know there is a lot of team members that are looking towards this team building, may be because not every year has team building, so everyone put a high expectation on you. Before I start to plan, I have received a lot of suggestions from the team members. They really have a lot of suggestions, suggestions for me to consider, when come to implementation, everyone expect you to execute their suggestions.

Even for the place of team building I have cracked my head to think about it. What I'm thinking is a place that is far from the city, somewhere remote. Some suggested Port Dickson, then other object because they have done at this place before. After hearing so many suggestion, finally I choose a place at Pekan. That is still not end of the story, when I go to the place to see see look look, the place is really far from Klang Valley. The journey from KL to there is around 4 hours. Since our team building is only 2 days 1 night, it will take a lot of time to travel to that place. Rough calculation is with the 30 hours that we have, 8 hours will be used for travel. Then we only have 22 hours to do activity. No choice have to scrap this suggestion.

Then I google for other place and few of us drive there to have a look at the suitable venue. Finally I have chosen somewhere at Tanjung Malim. Then all the liaise with consultant, the financial part, the HR etc. The story continue.

On that day, when we go there, someone commented that the place is not up to his standard. Sigh... I'm very sien to deal with all this boss comments. This not good, that not up to the standard, very hard to please them. Next time we all just do at Sunway, then everything u all satisfy lah~. Then the whole team building atmosphere suppose to be fun and exciting, suddenly someone really potong steam. Talk about the line problems, this and that, Tom and Jerry's story. What I think you should use this time to inspire others, not point out all the problems, then what is next? Ok for people to complaint, but what is more important is looking for room of improvement. The whole world also know how to complaint, what is great is people who come out with solutions, I really appreciate them.

Talking about my part, I'm presenting something during team building. Actually I plan to ask the technician to present, then they all chicken out. wtf! In the end I would have to present. Luckily I managed to get support from my boss and seniors to help it out, so that the presentation wouldn't be so dry. I'm really sorry to ask you all to stand in front, I only plan for 30 minutes, who know someone overtalk it, drag it to around 1 hour. I pity all the fellows that have to stand for 1 hour. Overall the session I'm quite satisfied, interaction is good and I hope that they really 'ingat baik-baik'.

For me, the accommodation is still ok, basic needs are covered. What really shine out is the river at there. The river is from the hill, so the water there is cold and current is strong. I really enjoy dipping in the river and playing water. It is a good experience. The jungle trekking is also great, in my life first time seeing leech since I'm a city boy. Going through the whole jungle is not a big problem, the great thing is the jungle is quite virgin, there is a part where the bush is thick and hardly see ant trail at there.

I can't forget all the fellows drinking 'Mountain Dew'. Drink until can langgar pintu. Really determined, knock the door for 20 minutes, hand really though, WTH!

It is too bad that those who unable to make it, the plant still need to run, you all have sacrifice your pleasure time to keep the plant running. This I really salute you all.

I think that is all for this team building journey. I want to continue writing but now is getting tired. For sure I will upload some photo at Facebook.


Saturday, April 7, 2012

Right or Wrong?

There is a situation where I have encountered and this incidents have made me sort of guilty. There is a junior that always come and stay at our rented house, once or twice is quite normal, however I have noticed that he come very often, almost every week he come and stay. This make me curious.

Last Thursday, when I came back and look for other house mate, he locked himself in one of the room and after knocking the door, he open the door and told me that I have scared him @.@ Then we went for some serious conversation, asking anything that makes him come to rented house every week without miss. The way he answer shown that he didn't tell the truth.

He said come for activity but I have challenged him that we don't organize activity every week. He keep quite for a while and say he don't know. This answer is really unacceptable, there is something that drive him to come to Petaling Jaya from Serdang every Thursday evening. Even the day is late, he is still come to PJ by taxi. He keep asking me some time for him to think.

It is impossible to say that you don't know what drive you to here. From there, I have managed to drill down to the tip of iceberg. He mentioned that his college got some problem where people have different ideology. That is bullshit as people from different ideology still can stay together.

Based on my observation and analysis, there are few things that may happen:
1) He is being bullied by other people in his college.
2) He don't have any friend(s) in the college.
From there, I can conclude that his confidence level is low and unwilling to face any problem. When you are telling a lie, you will convince yourself and pretend everything is fine, what his behavior shown is totally opposite. How come people can choose to avoid problem by escape to another place without having the gut to face it?

Therefore I have challenged him face his problem and don't come here for 1 month. The next day he went off. When I'm doing reflection on that situation, I just wonder am I doing the right thing or the wrong thing? When people don't want to face it, having to force them to face directly is a cruel action, but it is the best way too. There is a chinese saying good medicine taste bitter. Hope that everything will fine.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

My Journey Updated

It has been 10 months where I started to work after graduation. This 10 months is a journey for me, where I have countered excitement, frustration, boring, wonderful experience in my journey. My first job didn't last long, well it last for 4 months to be exact before I choose another company. I really miss the people there.

Then come my second job. I would say that my second job is challenging. When I told people that I'm working in this company, people would think that is a good company. If you look from the outside, it is a huge and reputable company where everyday million of consumers are consuming their products and their products are diversified. When I talk to my young colleague, they also share the same thing. It is a good reputation company and people think that getting inside is really though.

Either by luck or by chance, I'm appreciate what I have. What I appreciate the most is the structure of the organization. It is a very structured company where the system are in place, with the help of tools, you are able to unlock your potential. Their benefits are really nice in a way~

One day I noticed that their advertisement for this program take 1 page of the newspaper. Wow~

Anyway, looking at most of the friends beside me, most of them are in their 2nd job. I guess that young people have the tendency to change job when they are not satisfied. Although I also would like to change :-) but this company offer in term of pay, benefits and reputation are really hard to compare. Let see what happen after 2 years.

I have plan to continue study. The doubt is what course should I study? Engineering or business? With the experience that I'm gaining, I hope that it will be helpful. May be my study plan will become a plan, who knows~